24th November couldn’t have come soon enough. I just couldn’t wait to be discharged. I was borrreedddd and exhausted from sitting up the entire night holding my baby. Thank God I didn’t drop him. That was risky.
I still had to wait till the doctors had me thoroughly checked. Here I was in a bulky maternity pad PLUS those embarrassing adult diapers they have you wear. Did I mention how humbling childbirth was? LOL!
So anyway the Doc on duty finally came to my ward and checked up on me. He examined my tummy by pressing it in a bit to see if my uterus was contracting. I knew it was, because anytime I tried to breastfeed I was in pain! Imagine having contractions again AFTER childbirth just so your uterus can go back to it’s original form. Hmph!
Once again, because of my stitches and pain in my vagina, I couldn’t sit directly on the bed so I put a firm nursing pillow there and sat on it. That way, my hoohaa could sort of suspend in the hollow centre and breathe. I managed to take my bath (more like a dry clean because I couldn’t rid my mind of the idea of the nastiness that had gone on in that bathroom) It was very neat but no. EW. I had breakfast and took the meds I was given. A midwife came in and asked if I wanted to watch them clean Drew up . I agreed because I never got the chance to watch DJ’S. I had packed all his bath items at the foot of his crib so she just wheeled him out.
We walked into a room full of babies lying in their little cribs. They were all fast asleep. It was the cutest thing until….my baby decided to wake them up. The midwife had placed him down and he wasn’t having it. He cried! Goodness it was so loud and he wouldn’t stop. I watched as the midwife bathed him completely unfazed by his loud wails. Some of the babies joined in and we now had different high pitch cries. Some others just slept through all the chaos. I tried to pay attention (but was honestly too distracted and couldn’t hear a word she was saying) as she carefully lifted his chord and wiped it with spirit and then swaddled him and placed him in his crib. He finally calmed down. I couldn’t believe that loud cry was coming out of that tiny frame.
Once we got back to the ward, I fed him and he finally dozed off. I heard a knock on the door and it was the paediatrician. Talk about bad timing. Nevertheless, she still went ahead to examine him. She concluded he was fine and we were good to go. Surprisingly, right after the examination, he went back to bed. Kobby arrived just as she was leaving and helped me pack. A nurse came in and handed me all my paperwork including my Public health book for his vaccinations as well as our appointment dates for our next hospital visits. We placed him in his carrier and Kobby remarked
“It feels like I’m carrying just the carseat. He’s so light”
“Right? We need to be extra careful with him. He’s so fragile” I responded
We got all the stuff into the car and set off.
On our way home, I was both excited and nervous at how DJ would respond to him.
“Would he be jealous or warm? Aww how cute would it be when he sees his baby brother for the first time?” I thought to myself
I must’ve been living in a bubble, because it was the complete opposite once we arrived. We got home and walked to the back door with Drew as my mother-in-law excitedly came out to meet us with DJ. His reaction? He looked in the carrier and didn’t even acknowledge his brother. I think he didn’t quite get what exactly a baby was. He couldn’t be bothered. It might as well have been a teddy bear lying in there for all he cared.
“DJ look at your little baby brother.”
“Come say hi”
He ignored everything I said and just motioned for me to pick him up. Kobby came over and lifted him, knowing I was in no position to, and then bent him over to see his brother. He looked at him the same way he would look at a blanket. He just had a blank look on his face probably wondering what were we even talking about. LOL!
My mother moved in that evening to assist. She kept insisting on carrying DJ everywhere because she claimed she didn’t want him to feel like he had been “dethroned”. Unfortunately, that ship had sailed a long time ago.
Over the next few days, I was still having painful contractions when I breastfed but it was subsiding each day. This time, my vaginal healing wasn’t too bad. I wasn’t in pain when I peed. The pain was tolerable. The feeling was actually more of discomfort than pain. Drew was also drinking his milk regularly BUT he barely slept. This baby never slept for an hour straight. He would wake up every 30-40 minutes and cry! His cry was so loud, it would wake DJ up and he would also cry. Once he was up, everyone was up because there was no way you could sleep through that noise. (I was secretly glad I wasn’t the only one suffering this time around.)
We had assembled his cot in our bedroom because it was too early for him to be in the nursery with DJ. We didn’t want it to ruin his sleep pattern but it was ruined regardless because DREW CAN CRY! I cannot say this enough. Jeez! I felt like i was now experiencing motherhood for the first time. Having a child that slept 10 hours straight was not normal. This right here, is what mothers have been complaining about and it wasn’t easy. I got a headache every time i woke up to that.
The only thing that helped was, he would catch up on sleep during the day. He could sleep for hours during the day no matter how noisy it got. And yes, this was the period that I should’ve also slept but who sleeps during the day anyway? I just couldn’t do it. I walked around like a zombie and just ate everything in my way. 6 days after he was born, his cord fell. We were so happy. We could check one thing off our checklist.
The next day, it was time for our one week appointment. Drew had to see the paediatrician and I had to be examined by the midwife. I expressed my concerns to the doctor about his crying spells and how much he shook when he cried and she assured me it was normal. She advised us to keep him swaddled so that he doesn’t shake too much and that would also calm him down . She was right, it actually helped …not completely , but there was significant improvement.
The midwife was also very pleased and slightly surprised at how quickly I was healing. Its crazy how it works. My first birth was difficult but I had an easy baby and an equally difficult recovery. My second birth was quick and easy with a tough crier who won’t sleep and a very swift healing process. You win some, you lose some.
The days that followed, DJ started to acknowledge Drew a bit. It suddenly happened one day when I expressed into a bottle and fed Drew. DJ had been used to drinking milk from a bottle so was very confused to see a bottle being given to someone else. He curiously watched as I fed Drew and then looked up at me and then back at Drew as if to ask “What is going on here?” lol! The expression on his face was priceless.
Spa on wheels (@spaonwheelsgh) also came over to my place and gave me a very well needed complimentary massage and pedicure. They came with all their equipments, massage bed, towels, candles, and set the mood for a truly relaxing experience. Their staff was professional and i felt so relaxed when I was done with my massage. I got to experience their citrus splash pedicure which left my feet feeling so soft. Loved every bit of it.
The next week, we had Drew’s naming ceremony at home. Kobby’s dad was back in Ghana so we scheduled the date with him. We had a simple small ceremony just like the first one. We only had our immediate family and our catholic priest in attendance. This was done very early in the morning and it was over in about 40 minutes. Thankfully, DJ was fast sleep so we had no distractions.
After the ceremony was over, I decided to call the hospital and book an appointment for his circumcision. I wanted to get all these things out of the way so that he could heal once and for all. The paediatrician had advised us to go ahead. Also, we had done same with DJ and he was fine so what could possibly go wrong?
Yup. It turned out to be the circumcision from hell……..